Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they sometimes take the apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. The apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right person to come along, the one who is brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.
Now Men.... Men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.
The second part is misogynistic in the extreme! It's also mistaken. You show me a man who is acceptable to have dinner with and I'll show you a Senator from Idaho! (Yes, yes, I already used this once, but it's good, it's really, really good.)
6 comments:
Some women just write a bunch of horse shit and think they're soooo wise. THAT'S why you never read anything of historical significance that is written by a woman (or only read by women and/or ex-refugees).
But then again, ever since I tried to reach to the top of the apple tree and fell on my head, my wife's stilettos keep grinding into my groin...
So, Bert, you have pics of this Senator in the bathroom, do you?
And granted... women as apples? men as wine? Who comes up with this crap?
Apparently, she's talking about crab apples.
And as someone with a number of female friends, let me tell you that most women just hope for a guy to crash his motorcycle into the apple tree, and then they fall all down on their backs around his dazed, now-even-dumber-and-definitely-more-cracked head.
How's that for generic, sexist commentary? And who eats fruit, anyway? Communists, that's who. That's why most of them are Red.
I'm excited to be described as both "edgy" and "having a life" since neither are true.
Your grammatical sense is 'edgy.' As for having a life, you most certainly do to! You've just gone through taking the bar, you're looking for a job, you may or may not be aware of your biological clock, etc., etc., etc. Plus you live in our nation's capitol and feel the winds of history teasing at the hems of your skirts.
I live in a rural desert setting, my wife knows EXACTLY where I am every minute of the day, what I'm doing and who is with me, and she can tell you where I'll be every day for the week for the foreseeable future. I am dullsville compared to you!
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