(Please forgive the "whorse" thingie...)
Here's another proof (as if I needed it) of the 98.3% rule: This is Tony Blair speaking:
"Bad driving kills 1.2 million people a year and is a bigger danger to the world than war or disease. A thousand young people around the globe die every day in crashes and only Aids kills more young men."
First, the above statement, working backwards, means that 'bad driving' is the LEADING cause of death of young women. Which I personally find appalling, as it is theoretically possible that I might have one day had sex with one of them had she not shuffled off the mortal coil to Buffalo. Hey, if you play the lottery, you know what I'm talking about. You gotta know how to dream!
If PM Blair's facts are correct, and I've never caught him lying about non-sexual things in the past, 'bad driving' is an immediate, genuine concern! MADD is doing it's part. My local County Sheriff is doing his part. The CHP is doing its part.
But it's obviously not enough!
American Global Warming fanatics could score a Three for One victory here. Banning personal use of automobiles would save the environment, save a potential 1.2 millions lives a year AND liberate us from the hated oil barrel over which them there A-rabs currently have us revealingly and awkwardly positioned. We can probably then get by on our own oil, North Sea oil and maybe a little South of the Border oil for our commercial and public sector oil-based transportation needs.
I expect a song by Cheryl Crow any moment now called Three for One, extolling this plan, with a hook about Squeezing One Sheet of Charmin. Sure, not having personal vehicles would take a bit of getting used to, but we could do it! And the results would be totally worthwhile! And 1.7% of us are certain to want to get on this band wagon.
If you're not one of the 1.7% (and it is virtually impossible for one of them to get through any of my entries) you know exactly what the results of this new campaign are going to be. At least this way American car manufacturers would have a good excuse for going out of business. The concept of no personal gasoline powered vehicles on the American roads is so multi-layered and complex that even following one thread of it is staggering!
What's the latin for "Leave everything alone"?
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I saw a documentary about British drivers focusing on a gentleman named "Mr. Bean." While driving his ridiculously small car on a public highway, he shaved, read a paper, and did a number of other things that were supposed to be funny but weren't.
Perhaps many British drivers also saw this documentary, and realizing just how unfunny life can be, they swerve into oncoming traffic to prevent themselves and their victims from ever again living through sub par comedy.
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