It's true, I'm a sell-out. It was dark, they were big. But their message was crystal clear: "Drop out of the race or we'll break your putter."
My initial reaction was that they were bluffing. But then the biggest one, farthest back in the dark, said, "You've had your beryllium-copper Ping Pal 6, what, about 23 years, right?"
My blood ran cold. They knew about my Ping Pal 6, and my attachment to it. They knew that losing my putter would cripple me emotionally. I could win the plaudits of an entire country, but without my putter, it might as well all be ashes.
So, Social Security, and all the other entitlements all those Americans with their hands out have come to think of as set in stone are safe. It is the result of guile and intimidation, but the effect is the same, I am out of the 2008 presidential race.
To those who supported my candidacy, thank you. But watch your backs..., the goons are out there and they're hard at work.
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3 comments:
But, Bert....what am I supposed to do with all of the political signs that I had made for your campaign?!?!?!?!!?
Bert:
Sorry about the goons. Maybe I should have just called asked if you would step aside for me.
It's so hard to get good help these days....
Oh, no, there goes my Press Secretary position.
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