Yes, the humble rubber band, known to all of us, is a safe, reliable source of renewable energy. But there is a vast, two wing and all the tail feathers, conspiracy devoted to keeping this knowledge from public promulgation.
Back when I was a kid, even with old fashioned rubber bands, I was able to get almost 60 seconds of powered flight from my rubber-band powered airplane. Think where we could be today if research had not been stifled!
And why do the powers that be stifle rubber-band technology? For the same reason they scuttled the development of the moter that burned ordinary air for fuel. Of course the air-burning engine is a lot more complex than rubber band technology... Almost as complex as the static electric motor.
Had the vast oil-wing conspiracy not put the kibosh on rubber band technology, it could have been that by now home heating, public transportation, electrical production, and a host of other applications would now all be run on rubber band power!
Especially with so many more people in prison, who could spend their days winding rubber bands for use in civilian life. Talk about a renewable resource!! Plus you could convert wind and water power to winding rubber bands! The use of infinitely renewable rubber band power is only limited by the imagination! Here's a list, just off the top of my head, of personal use items that could be switched to rubber band power from electrical battery power... The savings would be enormous!
digital still and movie cameras
cell phones, PDAs, lap tops
vibrators
flashlights
golf carts
mopeds
pace makers
Please, just a small statue of me, commemorating my discovery of the female bosom...
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4 comments:
You know what the problem here is don't you? The crack in your great energy theory? The fact you can never find a goddarn rubber band when you need one. Then what?
Bosoms won't fly your plane, no sir.
Ms. Guv'ner, the government will supply them. And don't say they can't do a good job. When was the last time you couldn't find someone using government food stamps in line ahead of you?
You forgot to mention the flurry of energy your rubberband powered spitball generated in Miss Olsen back in fifth grade when your little globule took an unexpected trajectory,,, oh those were the days of paddles and rulers and pain, oh my.
we don't call them rubber bands here, they're called gum bands. rulers are called straight edges and sprinkles are jimmies. but sometimes only the chocolate ones are jimmies, depending on your sheet wearing status....
Jilly
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