X-Mess comes but once a year . . .
Here's how Laztheism would solve (and enhance) the X-Mess experience.
On June 01, 2008, the Master Computer that runs the United States will match up every American resident who will be over the age of 18 on 12-24-2008 with another American resident. This will be the only gift each American resident will have to buy for X-Mess, 2008.
Kids under the age of 18 on 12-24-08 will have to suffer the old system, doing the same old Santa-letter writing and begging.
The economy will not suffer. Once you've purchased a decent gift for the name assigned, you can use whatever other money you have to buy yourself "presents." So there will still be plenty of shopping going on. After all, you can't really count on your assigned gift giver to do as good a job as you can do for yourself.
The upside is the lack of pressure to buy gifts for "loved ones" and friends. All that pressure is gone. All that money you spent on your dumb ass family members can go to your kids and yourself. But mostly yourself.
And now, as we Laztheists say at this time of year: Have yourself!
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3 comments:
This is my religion now and in the future will be my explanation of why I am staying home on every holiday in stretchy pants, drinking beer.
Glad to see you back. We were getting worried. Bloggers around the globe have been talking about it!
I am very excited about this plan, because not only can I spend more on me, I don't have to worry about opening gifts from family members that tell me they have no idea who I am or what I like.
ignoring your post completely BB, I am glad to see that you are not actually a spy, missing on covert overseas danger missions. We were speculating as to your mysterious whereabouts.
I'm happy you're safe and happy and busy but slightly disappointed you WEREN'T kidnapped by pygmies and tortured with feathers before making a miraculous escape.
Oh well. HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
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