Tinkle Bomb

My life's work has finally been revealed!

Oh sure, I'm proud of my curb-painting legacy. It's been a worthy effort for a life yoked to the harness of capitalism. But I always thought something was missing. And now I've found it.

Just like the hula hoop, the slinky and the Frisbee, I've come up with a product that will enter the national consciousness and will eventually be my epitaph, if not my epigram or epithet.

America, I give you Bert Bananas' Tinkle Bomb!!!

So simple in concept, so rich in potential.

Tinkle Bomb is a colorless, odorless liquid. Like Coca-Cola and KFC, the ingredients must remain secret. The effect of this liquid, when poured into a toilet bowel, is to create a liquid which when uric acid is added, produces a voluminous quantity of billowing gray smoke whose only effect is, in women to create a nymphomanic euphoria, and in men to create the need to chop wood, literally, not figuratively.

There won't be a college dorm that won't, on probably a daily, find bottles and bottles of Tinkle Bomb in the trash can just outside the women's bathroom. Oh those wacky kids!

No, I don't need investors or distributors. Maybe some product testers and some product testimonials... Let's keep in touch on this.