Bert Bananas

Jesus wants you to have honey baked, spiral cut ham on Resurrection Day.

Long shot of hillside... zoom in on a darker spot on the hillside, revealing a cave. An angel flies in from screen right...

ANGEL: "He's not here! He has risen to dine on Honey Baked Ham! Seek Him in front of the TV!"

Switch to a blue collar home... A Jesus like handsome Caucasian is seated in a comfortable looking recliner. Seen behind Him is a table laden with dirty dishes, left-overs and a succulent looking Honey Baked ham, half eaten...

JESUS: "Wow, I'm stuffed! Nothing says Resurrection like a great meal, and there is no better reason to rise from the dead than digging into a Honey Baked ham. Be sure it's a genuine Honey Baked ham on your table this Easter or the Avenging Angel just might have to pay you a visit!"

camera moves over Jesus's head and zooms in on what's left of the Honey Baked ham, which begins to radiate light and a halo is seen forming over it as a voice over closes the commercial:

VOICE OVER ANNOUNCER: "Oh death, where is thy sting?"